There’s No Room For Comparisons

I look forward to all of my posts. I live for writing. 

HOWEVER, I occasionally look more forward to my Thursday posts specifically. Do you know why? Because Thursday is podcast day! Yes, I mention my podcast every chance I get. It’s just because I’m super proud of it. She also got a makeover for the new year. You can listen wherever you get your podcasts. That’s beside the point! 

On Thursdays, I get to take advantage of two platforms in two different ways. I get to talk to all of you in my most comfortable form, which is here on the blog. I get to work through things in a way that makes me feel confident and articulate. But I also get to talk to all of you in a more vulnerable and real way.  I am by no means a confident podcaster. I’d like to think that’s part of my charm. However, I get to show a little bit more of myself on the podcast. As much as I stumble over my words, I feel like I get to talk to all of you. Reading someone’s emotions is one thing, but getting to hear them is a whole other world. So, I like to save the more vulnerable topics for Thursday. 

With the start of the New Year, I’ve been thinking a lot about where I stand in life. Am I where I should be? Before I answer that, I need to define “should be.” But before that, I need to go back a little further. 

I grew up comparing myself to everyone. These comparisons started with physical appearance. It’s easy to compare yourself to others, especially with so many outlets to utilize. I was a dancer, I did cheerleading, and I did gymnastics. I stuck to dancing for 12 years. My cheerleading and gymnastics days didn’t last as long. As an 8-year-old with no flexibility and baby pudge, gymnastics was a disaster. I spent every session comparing my body to all of the other girls. I felt uncomfortable. I had to wear a tight leotard that didn’t fit properly. I took that comparison mindset with me as I got older. 

I started high school somewhere between the post-Myspace days and the beginning chapter of Facebook. Then somewhere down the line, Instagram debuted. So, I was comparing myself to the unobtainable and the gorgeous girls in my reality. I was not doing well. I felt uncomfortable in my skin. 

I’m not the only person who spends time comparing themself to everyone else. It’s okay! It’s going to happen, but you can’t let it control your life. We were all made to be individuals. We should be embracing that individualism! 

I grew up during a sensitive time. People weren’t as supportive or vocal about differences. Comparisons still happen, but they’re not as constant. 

At least not the physical comparisons. At the beginning of this post, I asked myself a question. 

Am I where I should be? 

I’m 25, with no career, no home of my own, no engagement, and no family of my own. I thought I’d at least have the first two by my 25th birthday. According to “society standards,” I’m not where I should be. 

That’s okay! I’m okay with where I am. I thought 2020 was going to be a different year. We all thought 2020 was going to be different.  It created setbacks. I was working in a dream industry and getting ready to get my own space. Then a pandemic hit. All of my progress halted. That doesn’t change the fact that I made progress! 

But having that progress doesn’t change the comparisons I’ve been making. All of my friends have landed careers, gotten engaged or married, moved into lovely apartments, and even started having babies. Don’t get me wrong. I’m overwhelmed with love and happiness for all of them! But I can’t help feeling like a lifetime behind them. 

The more I compare myself to them, the more I feel discouraged. I don’t want to be discouraged! Everything happens for a reason. I know that’s a cliche, but hear me out! If I had moved when I wanted to last year, I would have ended up in an unsustainable situation. I’m not where I thought I’d be. That’s not the end of the world. I have my podcast and this blog, which are both in the realm of my career path. I also have a job and a place to live! I’m in a decent spot. 

I’m content with my life. Everything will happen for me when it’s time. 

It’s natural for us to compare ourselves to others. But don’t get caught up in the timing of it all. You’re a beautiful person. You’re going to live your best life the way you want to.