I’m not sure if it’s the years of schooling or just the natural balance, but September always feels like a reset. It’s like the optimism of the New Year without the pressures of being a “new you.”
So with September 1st a week away, it’s time for an emotional revamp. I’m taking a page from Elsa’s Guide to Living and letting go.
Is anyone else paralyzed with fear at the thought of letting go?
Letting go has always been difficult for me. I’m not sure if it stems from insecurities, fears, or realizing the reality I’ve created in my head has come to fruition; maybe a combination of all of the above.
As a less than thriving teen I fought to hold onto the wrong things. You know those vulnerable years where things crumble and feel like the end of the world? When no one can talk sense into you because all your motivation comes from your immature heart.
Your heart drives more than just romantic relationships and stupid decisions involving those relationships. It also fuels friendships and every other aspect of your life.
When my heart was at it’s most fragile, I had to let go of everything. A romantic relationship and almost every friendship I’d ever established. It was the hardest realization, all my fears and insecurities bursting to the surface with undeniable truth.
It forced me to let go. This was four years ago. The first time I felt free. It was the first time in my life that allowed me to focus on me. I wasn’t worried about keeping people happy. I was keeping those people happy for two reasons:
1) I’m a people pleaser. I want, no I need people to be happy.
2) I was afraid they were going to leave me. I thought if I upset them, they’d leave and I’d be alone.
It’s okay to be alone. It’s also okay to be afraid to be alone. But I’d rather be alone than spend my time with people who don’t truly want me for me. It’s liberating.
But I feel like I’ve let some toxins back in since.
I don’t have time for toxic atmospheres. My insecurities might get the best of me on a daily basis, but I know that I’m better than that.
Letting go hurts at first. However, I think that’s because you’re not comfortable anymore. Whatever you’ve let go used to bring you comfort. In my experience, what kept me holding on was the comfort and the fear of not knowing what was next. Sometimes what comes from that leap is worth the fear.
Letting go is all part of that growing up and growing into your truest form process.
Invite the uncomfortable in. I’m encouraging the uncomfortable! I want to be free to be my truest self and if someone can’t accept that then it was nice knowing them.
So I’m going to *clears throat & belts* “Let it go, let it go, let it go.”
It’s never too late in the year to revitalize you; whether it’s emotionally like me or maybe it’s physically with a new hairstyle or power outfit. Whatever the case is, embrace every aspect of you. If something isn’t working let it go. I promise you’ll thank yourself later.
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